It's Mindfuckery
I first came across the term "mindfuckery" on YouTube, at the very beginning of my journey. I stumbled upon a channel where a woman was processing her relationship and its fallout.
In one video, she simply said, "It's mindfuckery." That word resonated with me and stopped me in my tracks. I naively thought I could hold my ex accountable—that I could get closure and he would realise what he had done.
MINDFUCKERY • Definition noun. Vulgar Slang. The term used to describe mental confusion inflicted deliberately by another person. 1. The action of someone behaving in a way, or performing an action, with the intent of seriously disturbing another person(s).
It's a covert manipulation that distorts your perception, making you question your sanity and memory.
Long-term contact with a toxic or emotionally abusive person causes significant damage to the brain. Your body, sensing danger, shuts down your brain to protect it and you.
Your INTUITION told you something was wrong, or you didn’t believe the story they were telling you. They lied to you, and you ended up QUESTIONING yourself while they minimised your feelings.
When the words don’t match the action: “But he says he loves me, why would he do that?” It is CRAZY-MAKING.
You are left in a state of confusion.
Cognitive dissonance occurs when you hold two or more contradictory beliefs at the same time.
Your intuition told you something was wrong, but the abuser convinced you to doubt yourself. They minimised your feelings, lied, and caused you to question your reality. This form of abuse penetrates so many levels, leaving you in a state of confusion. And this confusion, or MINDFUCKERY, can go on long after the relationship is over.
Words are cheap; actions speak louder than words.
You were trained to override your gut feeling when something seemed off—they may have told you that you had trust issues when questioning their bad behaviour.
Trauma bonding keeps people trapped in abusive relationships. It's a strong connection formed during the idealisation stage, where the abuser showers you with attention and affection. This bond is strengthened by the abuser's manipulation tactics, making it hard to enforce boundaries and leave the relationship.
Healing from this type of abuse requires closure, breaking the invisible chains, and healing the deep emotional wounds they opened up.
It's crucial to surround yourself with people who understand what you've been through. Trusting your intuition, grounding, and breathing exercises can help you reconnect with your body and start the healing process.
Mindfuckery has you believing them, and trauma bonding keeps you trapped.
Mindfuckery is painful but aptly describes emotional abuse.
It's important to heal these deep wounds and reset your boundaries.
Practising grounding and breathing techniques will help you stay in your body and keep you out of rumination or help you get out of rumination quicker.
Creating a safe space signals your body that it’s safe, and will allow the stress hormones to slow down or stop for a moment.
For more ways to accelerate your healing, check out these links for my self-care guide and videos on grounding and breathing. These techniques are essential for healing.
Add comment
Comments